Dave B - Drums
Dave escaped a maximum security convent back in 1946 and went on the run, playing in various jazz combos and swing clubs around the canals of Venice. After commandeering a gondola he made his way to England where he got roped into playing a number of gigs with Leroy Payne's All Stars, before falling into the clutches of MIDDLE:6. Dave's lucky charm is one of Elvis' toes.
Pat - Bass
Some of you may recognise Pat from his many TV apperances on Police 5, Crimewatch, The Cook Report and Brookside. Despite being offered a starring role in the new Quentin Tarantino movie, Pat decided to perform with MIDDLE:6. "I would much rather play with MIDDLE:6 than star in a Quentin Tarantino film", he said at gunpoint. Pat's lucky charm is a care bear called Moses.
Ally - Vocals, fife, tambourine and clapping
After retiring as Kate Bush's stunt double Ally started working for Jools Holland as a wrangler to stop all the black keys escaping from his piano. "The white keys felt safe as Jools hardly uses them" she commented. Ally was tricked into joining MIDDLE:6 by Jez after he read one of Derren Brown's mind control books. Ally's lucky charm is the Titanic.
Luis - Lead Guitar
Luis is descended from a race of Tibetan yak herders, some of which were known to have taken their job too seriously. He discovered a penchant for playing the guitar on holiday in Cleethorpes when Joe Satriani failed to show for the under 15s disco on the Friday afternoon. Luckily the rest of the band were there. Luis' lucky charm is a rare gum disease.
Keli - Keyboard, vocals, tambourine, shakers
Hailing from a future race of hyper-intelligent Elvis fans, Keli perfected her time machine and headed back to 2014 before suddenly realising that she'd forgotten to include a 'reverse' button. She was recruited into the band by Luis in exchange for next week's lottery numbers, which she still hasn't coughed up yet. Keli's lucky charm is a broken fingernail.
Jez - Guitar, vocals
Jez had to give up his favourite hobby of wandering the aisles of Tesco's because his trousers were alarming the other shoppers. This may be due, in large part, to the fact that he had bought them off the current holder of the World Ferrets Down Your Trousers Record Holder. This also accounts for the way he dances when playing the guitar. Jez's lucky charm is the planet Jupiter.
Pete - Sound Tech, Guitar (occasionally), pint
Pete was found wondering aimlessly after training to be a lamp-lighter turned out to be a flop, due to gas not making 'a comeback.' He then blagged his way into the band before playing only one gig, in which he missed his lead intro while nipping to the bar for a quick pint. Pete was chastised for not fetching everyone a pint! Pete's lucky charm is disappearance.